21 December 2018

Why I don't wear make up, and have more body confidence

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hey guys it's Briony and today I'm gonna

be talking about makeup and more specifically why I choose not to wear it so my journey with makeup actually starts back when I was about six years old when I was five I started dancing and when I was six I became a competitive dancer and I started performing on stage for those of you that work in like the entertainment world of any kind with those dance-drama singing whatever you know that you have to wear stage makeup when you go on stage so that's when I kind of first became introduced to makeup and of course I hated it because it was so like stage makeup tends to be really thick and cakey at least is nothing was when I was younger so like you had this thick foundation on and it's blusher and bright red lipstick and eyeshadow like up to your eyebrows and winged out an eyeliner which is all for when you're six mascara the whole lot and it like now even some kids have fake eyelashes so unfortunately I never was put through that but I remember that quite well as well so that's when I was first introduced the idea of makeup and if it been up to me I would have never chosen to wear it at all on a daily basis even

in a more subtler version but growing up as a girl when I hit sort of my tweens and my early teenage years I became aware of makeup a lot more obviously through my classmates now at my school I'd say the girls started wearing makeup actually from like year 6 but I didn't really start to try them and play around with it I think as I was around 11 12 maybe 13 12 or 13 I think it's probably the H and I started thinking about it more that's also the age where I started to go through puberty before 12 I didn't really have breasts or hair or anything like that that's when it kind of hit for me and then I got my period when I was 14 but when I was at school I was like at the bottom of the social hierarchy if you can call it that I was because of the weird one always was now I love being weird but of course we're at school and you're the one that doesn't quite fit in it can be really difficult so I think that I stone-like really playing around with makeup more as a way to sort of fit in with the others than for me actually wanting to work myself but around 12:00 I started to get into it more my mum I remember took me to get on my makeup and stuff and I think

because like it's seen as just a natural progression for girls she was on board with me doing that she helped me by like tinted moisturizer and and all that kind of stuff I started wearing it when I was a teen as well like the big craze then you know like highlighters all the thing now that wasn't around at least it wasn't big when I was a teenager it was bronze everyone had to have a bronzer and then over that here's there's just been like new things added I have no idea what's even really in the space now I mean I watched Geoffrey style videos but like that's as far as I go with makeup I could really know what's going on with it but back when I was a teen it was bronzer and I remember one day I must have like messed it up because my school day started really early I had to get up at 7 it's really dark most of the time of the year when you're getting up in a school year so I must have been dating my wonky light by my sink and I just messed up the bronzer here and I had this big streak and I've got quite embarrassed more my friends point out to me she was like you've got an orange

streak across your chin so yeah that was my one of my fails with makeup as well but that was when I really started to get into it and I thought okay to be one of the big girls and to be growing up I need to be wearing this every day but I get it down or practicing and all that kind of stuff and that's where I started to wear makeup on a daily basis but then when I was around 13 or 14 I can't remember exactly there was one day where I'm not sure why but for some reason I either didn't have time to get my makeup on or I couldn't be bothered and I was just going shopping with my mom and I decided not to put it on it was like their time thing or as I said can be bothered went down to the car got in with her went off we drove to the shopping center parked got out and went in the lift and I can vividly remember this but I got out of the lift and I was so self-conscious I felt like everyone was staring at my skin at my face obviously I was a teenager so I probably had some I've never had really bad acne but I mean you can see now like I get sports anyway it's just normal part of like having the female hormones and stuff um but yeah like I think I must've

been super like hyper aware of it and thinking everyone was looking at me in reality they were probably just looking at me because I was a human being walking past them and it was just a brief glance of you know who's who let's have a look at who's around us but I thought they were staring at my face and very quickly I realized oh my god brownie this is not healthy what have you done to yourself I swore I would never become that who couldn't leave the house without makeup on and that's what I'd become I was like I was all I was terrified I hated it and from that day I went complete cold turkey and I didn't wear makeup again I literally just stopped I was like this is unhealthy this is not right it's wrong you need to reverse this and I stopped the first few days were all hope honestly after about a week I'd flip back to being totally fine with it it was just that one time first after wearing it for so long constantly on a daily basis and every time I went out that I suddenly had that flip back but it really wasn't as hard to reverse as I thought but you you become so like the makeup becomes such a

part of your routine that you think it's normal that when you don't do it it mess you think people are staring you or you're gonna weird or wrong and all this sort of stuff and in reality you don't it's just in your head but I knew it wasn't healthy so that's when I stopped it wasn't until several years later that I started wearing it again and this would have been around the time actually was wrong when I was 18 the only reason I started wearing makeup again at 18 was because my one insecurity and I'm very lucky I only have one but it is the fact that I have a baby face as you can probably tell if you're not familiar with my channel you would never be able to guess my age from look at me I'm actually 21 but people tend to think I'm a teenager because a I'm petite I'm 5 foot 2 but also be I have this baby face which I don't really mind but the one thing that's always very self-conscious with is with work and with dating so I used to because of my business if I was having a business meeting with someone I was always worried I wasn't gonna be taken seriously because I was so small and I look so young so I put makeup on then to try and make

myself appear a bit older and the same thing kind of applies of dating whenever I went on dates I had this whole plan so what I would do is I put on a decent amount of makeup on the first date but not so it was really obvious so like I probably put foundation on but a blusher bit of lip tints and thus currants and eyeshadow I never wore eyeliner because that was never really my thing but I would do that to kind of go and meet the guy and hopefully I hoped it's like kind of make me look a bit older because I can kind of kissing your cheekbones does does help a little bit with baby faces and then my plan was every if I like the guy the next time I saw him I kind of take a bit of it away so possibly wouldn't put foundation or blush your arm but still kind of keep the lip tint and the mascara and maybe the eyeshadow whatever and then the third time I saw him go completely bare face so it was kind of a gentle did he like gently reducing the bit so it was like Nash gradually becoming see what I look like most of the time because I also don't wear makeup on a day-to-day basis anymore so I keep me to see me like that and

then I realized literally none of them ever noticed ever that I was wearing makeup I wasn't my makeup they could like they couldn't tell unless you're wearing really bold makeup and it's like bright purple or you know really defined eyes or something like that the chances are they aren't gonna have a clue that you've worn it so I realized why am I doing this and stressing about this when they don't even notice it so I think it was only about a year ago but I stopped doing it when I went on dates and I haven't noticed a thing since it's never been a problem and I feel so much more confident because I'm like they're seeing the real me up front and that's actually a benefit so yeah but that was the only reason I went back to it I don't even wear it for business meetings anymore I tend to actually wrap my hair now bizarrely there's a couple of professional wraps I've done one of them on my vlog channel as well like if you're interested there's a particular wrap you can do which a I do when my hair is a complete mess or I can't be bothered to deal with it but be it also can make you look a

little bit older and the other thing I do is I actually wear glasses for like driving and for watching television because I'm short-sighted so sometimes if I'm going to a meeting I'll wear my glasses because they're cat eye glasses and they do make me look a bit older and I'll also do my hair in a style that's not this plat which makes me again that like a teenager so there are other things that I can do without makeup that can help you look older but makeup can definitely make you look older if you want to for certain things but I've just learned that for me personally I feel much more comfortable if I don't even bother with it I do still wear it for occasions like you know big events and stuff when I'm dressing up and I consider it kind of part of the costume a bit like dancing now that I finish dance I don't need to wear stage makeup but the rest of the time it's certainly not something I wear on a daily basis or ever intend to and one of the big reasons I wanted to make this video is because I'm aware that a lot of you guys that watch me are younger or in your like early teens or in your mid teens and you're at that stage where you're

trying to fit in or maybe experimenting with makeup and it's kind of like a fun thing and I really want you to try and keep it there and keep it as a fun experimental thing if that's something you're interested in don't ever let it get to the point where you cannot leave the house without it on where you can't do things that on or you feel like you're ugly without it because it's not true and you're absolutely beautiful the way you are I definitely feel more body confident and more body positive without makeup and I've noticed this had an effect on everything because I've kind of rejected the whole like social view of beauty as it is because like I did you could tell like I don't do my eyebrows or anything that's the thing I seem to get the most flak for on YouTube actually no one ever comments on this in real life by the way no one ever seems to notice unless they're like particularly obsessed with eyebrows and but people will know I don't get my eyebrows threaded or anything cuz it doesn't bother me you know and often people who do have everything done like their makeup perfect and they work out all the time

they have these slender bodies and all this sort of stuff they're not actually happy with the way they look there's constantly something they think they can improve in fact if you look at some of the interviews that have been had with the Victoria's Secret Angels which you know I think most people would agree in society or held up as being like the perfect body type there's probably gonna be quite a few air quotes in this video I apologize but as having that perfect body type of it such thing exists they have some of the biggest insecurities of anyone else because with their bodies because they're constantly thinking and things they can improve and stuff and the likelihood is even if you could get a body type you're not gonna be happy with it the only reason you should ever really try to lose weight or change your body type is if a doctor tells you you need to do it for health reasons but otherwise for the sake of your personal views on your body you need to learn to love yourself as you are I never worry about my body shape or the way I look or think all I need to lose weight or I wish I had a flat stomach or it's my thighs a little bit slimmer the only

thing that I ever went through as a teenager was thinking my thighs are a bit too big but I was dancing back then so of course my thighs but like I had a lot of power in them from like leaps and stuff so that really helped me to deal with that I also think bizarrely having Lyme disease and go through a chronic illness has helped me of my body image because everything that was going wrong with me go wrong internally but nobody could see it from the outside so from the outside I could look normal and I think in some weird way that actually helped me of my body confidence and my own body self-image which is not something that you necessarily thinks a lot of people who go through that tend to develop depression and anxiety and have issues to their body but for me I actually worked out better which is which is a good thing but the reality is even if you aim to get that perfect body type in you it to the gym all the time to maintain it it's gonna make you miserable and not gonna make you happy rather than aiming for a certain size you're better aiming to be healthy and love your body the way is then my only

issue self confidence wise as I said before is my baby face but even that doesn't really affect me on the day to day basis and I tell myself you know there's nothing you can really do about it so you just have to accept it as it is I do for the most part but I totally get why some people really do struggle with this body self-image because it is bombarded at us constantly I never read teen magazines or anything like that I don't really tend to follow Instagram models either you know and when I see people with their body types and like that's great but that's your body and my body looks perfect how it is I mean people will say to me but briney you were a dancer you have a dancer's body you know I'm not straight up and down I do have hips and breasts I have that hourglass figure that you know typically people apparently want but since when as I said before with the Victoria Secret engine models since when does that dictate that you won't have any self competence issues people could tell you look fabulous that doesn't mean that you don't have them just because you're slim everyone has a self-confidence issue about something so that's really a silly

statement to make and I mean I have stretch marks as I said before I've got spots I've got scars like I've had surgeries and stuff so you know the I've been definitely not quite the perfect body but there is no such thing as that perfect body I realized this is kind of diverse a bit for makeup but the two are really tied together because it's all about self image and self confidence times I do think makeup is okay and one of the things I do like about how the YouTube community is kind of switched recently is because of the rise and the male beauty gurus there's a lot more focus on this more dramatic makeup which is clearly not for like well I guess you could wear it every day but it's clearly not a sort of natural makeup look this is my daily looking kind of called the time with this beautiful skin which is unrealistic sort of thing it's this bold like eye shadow eyeliner you know all this sort of stuff in these crazy look which is much more of an artistic thing and about self-expression and playing around with the color and stuff which i think is really great as long as you can always take it off and leave the house without

being self-conscious you're good but if you ever do reach to this phase remember the best thing to do is to take it off and get yourself used to going out without it because it really you'd never want to become trapped by it trust me I've been there it is difficult to break the first few days but after a week it does get a lot easier trust me so if you are someone that enjoys using makeup just remember to try and keep it in that fun stage I don't let me get to the point where you feel that you have to go out without it or you're not going to feel beautiful but have you had similar experiences with makeup or do you choose to wear it or not wear it I'd be really interested to know so leave them down in the comments thanks for watching guys please do subscribe and don't forget you can get my products and club pads and must-have catch my website down below brush the Stars check out the rest of my channel for all that stuff and I'll see you next week bye guys [Music]